How to Make Yourself More Resilient

Have you ever had one of THOSE days...you know, the bad kind where everything comes flying straight at you fast and furious with NO end in sight. Problems keep popping up every which way. You try to stay on top of things but it just doesn’t work. 

You lose your cool, getting more and more frustrated (or angry or hopeless or overwhelmed  or defeated). It feels like there is no time for your feelings so you put your head down and keep on going. No matter how fast you react to what’s in front of you, more problems keep appearing. These days can happen at work or at home. Nothing brings on one of these days like a houseful of sick kids and a parent who is facing a deadline at work.

The truth is, we have all had those days. And they are truly no fun! What makes some people tolerate them better than other people? 

In a word: resilience. 

Resilient people respond to things instead of reacting. They look inside to find good answers to problems and not just react with whatever emotional experience the problem engenders in them.

Resilient people have the ability to process everything that is coming at them and make good choices.

Resilience is a skill set, a way of being that you can develop so that what you are able to do in the heat of the moment improves. And resilient people bounce back. 

How do you make yourself more resilient? The short answer: know yourself. Who are you in your heart-of-hearts? Beneath the hurts, the betrayals, abandonments, the limiting beliefs that tell you you are smaller than you really are?

Your true self is the foundation of your self-confidence, your strength, your creativity. When you know who you are and live your life as your true self, you are resilient. 

Then how do you know yourself? Pay attention. You are constantly showing yourself who you are. That would be who you are right now, with all of your limiting beliefs and information about the world that is of questionable validity. Once you see the truth of your present moment, then just be really kind to yourself about all of it and ask what your heart has to say. 

This little practice will generally get your current beliefs to shift and align themselves more with what your heart knows. 

Here is a short audio to walk you through a simple exercise that increases your ability to listen to yourself and respond in an open-hearted way to what your body is asking.